Pool jokes
"Joe Mama so fat she plays pool table the Earth."
What pool never runs dry?
The one on the Titanic.
A tortoise was in a dry pool along with some geese. The tortoise said that they could carry him to a fresh pool. Then the geese flew through the air holding the tortoise. The tortoise was about to say something, but fell and died.
How do you drown a blonde? You tape a mirror to the bottom of a 13-foot deep pool.
Why did Sally drown in the pool?
She had no arms, remember.
How do you fit 1000 babies in a swimming pool?
A blender.
How do you get them out? Slurp them up with a straw.
I got caught peeing in the pool.
The lifeguard blew his whistle so hard I nearly fell in!
Papyrus: Nyhe heh heh! I got a swim suit! And it even says cool dude!
Sans: I guess now it says pool dude ;)
Papyrus: SSSSAAAAANNNNSSSS!
How many dead kittens does it take to clog a pool filter? Seven when I tried!
How do you get 30 drunk Canadians out of the pool?
"Please get out of the pool."
Friend, your mum's fat.
Me: Well, your mum's so fat, she played pool with the planets.
What do you call a pool full of white people?
Kix.
Yo mama so fat! When she jumps into a pool, NASA found water on Mars!
What do you call blue and orange at the bottom of a pool?
A baby with flat armbands!
What did the tree wear to the pool party 🥳?
Swimming trunks.
What did the duck do when he crossed the road?
The duck jumped into a pool of ant piles! 💀💀
You're so short, I bet your parents left you at home most times when they went to the pool because they're scared you'll drown in the kiddie pool.
"Look, Ma! I peed in the pool!"
What's yellow and blue and found at the bottom of a pool? A baby with slashed floaties.
What do you call a terrorist in a kids' swimming pool?
A bath bomb.