You get on an elevator and you find the Pope and Donald Trump cowering from two snarling wolves. In your hand you find a revolver with only two bullets in it... what do you do?
You shoot the Pope and the Donald each in a leg and exit the elevator at the next stop.
What do you call a woman in a fighter jet to the right of the president?
An escort.
How do you find out about the accomplishments of the former president of the United States James Earl Carter?
Read the label on the jar of Skippy peanut butter.
What do British politics and transgender people have in common?
Both aren't what they used to be...
Jokes about ISIS are all about the execution.
What's so special about Palestinian sex dolls?
They blow themselves up.
What is the difference between Kanye and Hitler?
Hitler knew when his career was over.
Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high-ranking position in the US government?
Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
Whatโs the difference between a feminist and a suicidal vest?
A suicidal vest actually works when triggered.
What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?
Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!
What type of tea does the Social Justice Warrior avoid?
Reality.
What do the initials CIA stand for?
Central Intelligence of A**holes.
Who were the greenest Presidents in US history? The Bushes.
Tons of people committed suicide on 9/11 by destroying government property.
Not to mention and by plane.
What do you call a Black-Asian dictator?
Kim Kong Coon.
What is the best joke of all time?
Feminism.
Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump?
Because orange is the new black.
What do you call a tall terrorist?
Osama Bin Laden.
How do you anger a democrat?
Don't tell him the truth.
Enough with the Hitler jokes. They make me Fuhrer-ious!
