Politics jokes
Mario: Princess Peach got kidnapped again!
Luigi: Where did they go?
Mario: To the left.
Luigi: Fuck
People have been telling me that you can get things for free now.
The other day I saw a sign saying "FREE PALESTINE."
Bro, the US keeps bullying the UK because the queen died, and do you know the meme "No Bitches?" Yeah, they put "No Queen" instead. And guess what? The UK replied this time and said, "No Towers?" I was shocked. UK's most devious lick.
What was JFK's favorite school TV show?
BrainPop.
"Sharing is communism."
Memes
Me: "The villain has a point, you know."
Everyone else watching the WW2 documentary:
What do you call a Fuhrer who's also a fitness coach?
Adolf Fit-ler.
What do you call a German that can't see? A Notsee.
What do you call a blind German?
A Nazi/Nattzee.
Why is the Azovstal Steel Plant important to the Russian?
Because it stores Zelensky's balls of steel!
How is there evidence of climate change?
The liberal snowflakes are drastically melting down!
Shrek and the Hulk became politicians.
And they created The Green Party.
What do you call a nazi that can’t see?
A nozi.
What do you call a woman in a fighter jet to the right of the president?
An escort.
Why don't communists like Microsoft? Because it's Minecraft instead of ourcraft.
If you go to someone's house and see the flag of the former Soviet Union hanging on the wall,
that's a big red flag!
What do the Nicaraguan Contras, Crips, and Crack have in common? The CIA.
What's the difference between Putin and Hitler? I don’t know, you tell me.
I would tell a Biden joke except everyone would not stop falling asleep (including him).
Who is Osama Bin Laden’s secret cousin? Barack Obama or Barack Osama Bin Laden?