Politics jokes

Why are Americans so bad at chess?

Because they have already lost 2 towers!

The S in America stands for safe.

Who is Osama Bin Laden’s secret cousin? Barack Obama or Barack Osama Bin Laden?

When your gf tells you to treat her like a queen,

and then you remember you’re French.

The new pandemic is feminism and all kinds of democratic thinking. COVID is a joke compared to these nasty ass diseases.

My cousin asked me, "What do you think was going through Hitler's mind right before he died?"

I told him, "Probably a bullet."

I would tell a Biden joke except everyone would not stop falling asleep (including him).

How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!

Why did Hitler go for handicap?

Because they can’t stand up for themselves.

What did Donald Trump serve to Justin Trudeau at a state dinner?

Poutine with Russian dressing!

I'd love to move to a country ruled by Scott Stapp of Creed. Not only is it a place with golden streets, but it also welcomes people of all kinds with arms wide open.

If Hitler was in a car doing his salute, he would be saying, "Take the third right."

Joe Biden is the first president in history to have a vice president on record claiming they believed sexual harassment allegations against him.

I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big elephant in the room!

"Everyone knows I love kids better than people."

- Joe Biden. (A.K.A. Pedo Peter.)

If I'm racist for voting Trump, then you're a pedophile for voting Biden.

Biden: See you later, alligator!

Alligator: In a while, pedophile.

Biden: My girlfriend called me a pedophile. I said, "That's a pretty big word for a 9-year-old!"

Joe Biden deez nuts.

What did Obama ask Trump?

Hello guys. It's me, Donald fuckin' Trump. Ask me anything in the comments, guys.