Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?
Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)
Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.
Me: *Confused*
Sister: They're both horrible.
Play Jokes
Why can't the USA and England play chess?
USA has no towers and England has no queen.
The orphan can’t play soccer because he doesn’t know where home is, and his school is too dumb to learn.
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
I was playing Fortnite with a kid, then I heard their emo sister in the background, and it sounded like they were playing Fortnite, too, with the pistol shot and all.
Why do gay people like sports?
Because they get to play with balls.
What did the plane say to the twin towers?
"Lmao, you twins don't know how to play Jenga. Here, let me show you how!" (BOOM) ;)
What is an emo kid's favorite game?
Hangman.
Why are people so worked up about 9/11? They were just playing Jenga.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
Why do you not play with a cheetah? Because they cheat!
Why don't some people have balls? Because they play soccer with them.
I got in trouble at school today because I played the knife game with a pair of scissors, but I couldn't flip them off because I was missing that finger.
A man walks into a pharmacy and buys multiple containers of Tylenol, and the clerk asks why he's buying all of these. He replies with, "I'm playing 1 pill eat 100."
Being a police officer in Nunavut must be so fun. They get to play Cut the Rope on the job all the time!
Why does Michael Jackson like to play ping pong or table tennis? He likes to play with the little balls.
when you don't have a phone to play Fruit Ninja and improvise.
People be like: "What happened to Fruit Ninja? It was on your phone."
Me: "I upgraded, now I can play on my pro max thigh/wrists."
While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, “No honey for you for one month!”
Later that afternoon, Johnny’s dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. “That’s it! No butter for you for one month!” says his dad.
Later that evening as Johnny’s mother cooks dinner, a cockroach runs across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, “Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?”
What do you call a toy that has a story?
Toy Story.
