Play jokes
Dad: Here you go son, all your toys have gone to the orphanage.
Son: Why, Dad?
Dad: You would be bored there if there was not anything to do.
Why can’t orphans play GTA and get five stars? Because they’re not wanted!
What’s a priest's favorite sport?
Golf, because most of the holes are less than 18.
Father: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Father: So you won’t be bored. You’re going to need them there.
What did the man say to his wife, wanna play?
Here are some skeleton jokes.
You know the average person tries too hard and works himself to the bone.
If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone, I can give you a real humorous joke.
I used to play the trumpet, now I play the xylo-bone.
I'm always happy; nothing gets under my skin.
I made you some turkey for lunch. Bone appetit!
I'm glad I had you; I'm no longer bonely.
I've got a skele-ton of more jokes, but I'm just giving you one more.
Did you hear about the skeleton ninja? He was very skullful (skillful)!
Why does an orphan hate playing baseball?
Because it has no home base.
Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble?
He got caught playing with his Privates!
Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
What happens when you are playing Undertale, but it's snowy in town? It SNOWED in town!
Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?
Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.
Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.
Little Johnny went on a camping trip. All the tents were taken, so he shared with the teacher. So Little Johnny says: "Can I play with your bellybutton? My mom always lets me when we camp." So the teacher says: "Sure." 5 minutes later the teacher says: "Woah, woah, woah that's not my bellybutton!" Little Johnny says: "Woah, woah, woah, that's not my finger."
Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Alright, you motherfuckers get off here, and you motherfuckers get off here." His mom comes rushing in and says, "Little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!"
After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Okay, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in the kitchen."
Q: What did one gay cowboy say to the other gay cowboy?
A: Hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
Why is America so bad at playing chess?
They lost two towers.
Guess what song was playing during 9/11? Timber by Ke$ha.
What instruments do skeletons like to play?
Trombones.
What is the worst tool to play when playing the game “Icebreaker”?
The Titanic.
What is the opposite of Progress?
Congress.
My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.