Play jokes
What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?
The NBA because all the black guys are playing.
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).
12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
Why should you keep English gay activists away from neo-nazis?
British cigarettes get smoked easily.
I like playing with Yoyos, because at least they always come back.
Roses are red, pussies are wet, when it goes in he gets upset. She said it's too small, so that's all. But later that day, he wanted to say, "Every time I play, no one complains, so she was just lying." She started flying, went out of her seat, the skirt went up, the greatest of them all. Everyone said, "Fly away big chunky balls."
What did the man say to his wife, wanna play?
Why do animals have playing cards with foxes?
Because they’re a bunch of cheetahs!
Boy and girl playing hide and seek... girl: "I found you." Boy: "What gave me away?" Girl: "Ur parents obviously."
Little Johnny was playing with dick when his teacher walked in the room. She asked him what he was doing, he said Im doing my homework. The teacher saw how big his cock was and asked him to have sex with her. He willingly did so. Little johnny was already 25 so it didn't matter. The only thing was that he was homeschooled.
Why does Michael Jackson have such a hard time playing chess?
He can't choose between black or white.
Little Johnny ran into the kitchen and asked his mother, "Mom, can little girls have babies?" His mom answered, "Of course not." A few minutes later, his mom heard him shout to his friend, "It's okay, we can keep playing!"
Did you hear about the emo kid who auditioned for the school play?
He made the cut.
Why can Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
Why don't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why did the orphan not play baseball? Because he couldn't find home.
Yo mama so blind that when she played Fortnite, she got her vision back, got 'em!
The orphan can’t play soccer because he doesn’t know where home is, and his school is too dumb to learn.
Bro, I love hanging out with white people, it's either we play Yahtzee, or we playin' Nazi.
Did Mr. Rusher play tennis in the dark?
You will get hit by the tennis ball! Ouch, Mr. Rusher said.
Wanna play shark attack? I eat, you scream!