Play jokes
Why don’t rappers play hide and seek?
Because good rappers always stand out!
I'm playing a game of HANGMAN. Is there an 'S' or a 'C'?
MIKE PEN__E??
Why did the rapper refuse to play cards?
Because he was tired of dealing with all the jokers.
What kind of trumpet are you playing?
An "Donald Trumpet"!
What game console do emergency vehicles play? Wii U!!!
What is small, red, and sitting in the corner?
A baby playing with a scalpel.
When the class plays hangman, the emos get inspired!
What is the best feeling for an orphan when he plays Grand Theft Auto?
When he is wanted!
Figure: Who wants to play hide and seek?
Seek and Hide: Me.
Figure: Okay, hide and I will hide and Seek will be it.
Seek: Why do I have to be it?
Figure: Because your name says so.
Why can't orphans play on a computer?
'Cause they have no motherboard.
Once I threw the ball at a wheelchair kid. Now we are playing Rocket League! :D
Why doesn't anyone play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
A man sacrificed children who played Roblox, so when someone knocked on the door, they said, "An administrator has banned you from heaven!"
Sometimes, you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun.
What do boobs and toys have in common?
Kids end up playing with toys, but adults end up playing with boobs.
What position would a man with no legs and arms play in baseball?
Home base.
A blind man walks into a woman's bar and asks the person next to him if she would like to hear a blonde joke. The woman says, "Before you tell your joke, you should know the bartender is blonde and has a shotgun, the bouncer is blonde and has a baseball bat, the two playing music are blonde and have pistols. Do you still want to tell that joke, cowboy?" He thought for a second and said, "Not if I have to explain it five times."
Why can't Jesus play hockey?
He keeps getting nailed to the boards.
Chesley, in horror, runs out of the cockpit of the plane coming from London, "I'm so very sorry, everyone. I punched the wrong buttons, and we are heading to DC instead of New York, and we are about to run out of fuel." He opens the door and turns around to the five passengers and exclaimed, "I've parachutes but miscounted. We only got four for the passengers." He jumps off.
Donald faced the other four and orders:
"I'm the greatest leader of the world, and I'll make the decision. Tony, you go first. Our country needs you. The whole wide world needs you. Pandemic is raging."
Tony jumps off.
"Francis, my friend, you go next. Pandemic is ravaging the mind and body of millions. Their soul needs saving. Save Vladimir's and Xi's for me."
Francis jumps off.
Hillary faced Donald furiously. "Who are you to make decisions for us? I should have been president. I'm the smartest woman in the whole world in history."
Hillary jumps off.
Donald gazed at the young woman and started talking: "I'm an old man. I have already lived a full life - beautiful wives, children, just a beautiful life. Just beautiful. I've become president of the most powerful country, the most beautiful, the richest. Regrets? I've made a few but did it my way. Greta, go on. Your future is bright. I just wish I can make my country great again and have the chance to help save the world with you. I believe in second chances. Look at my bankruptcies, believe me. And I wish I've played more golf and..."
Greta interjected, "Just shut the f* up. The plane is about to crash. Let's go and save the world. The smartest woman in history took my backpack!"
Why can't an orphan play basketball?
Because no one will be cheering them on.