Planet

Planet jokes

Uranus

Kid to daddy: "Why do they call it Uranus?"

Daddy to kid: "Cause, son, it's Uranus."

Uranus

Want to know why some astronomers are gay?

It’s because they want to be in Uranus.

Girlfriend

Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"

The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"

A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"

Uranus

Many were curious about how methane ended up on Mars.

I'm pretty sure it was because of Uranus.

Uranus

Teacher: What’s the closest planet?

Kids yell: Sun.

Except for one.

Other kid: Uranus.

Teacher: Uranus?

Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.

Astronaut

What do astronauts 👩‍🚀 do when they’re on break?

They eat launch. 🚀🥪

Mama

"Yo mama is so fat that when I buried her, she made the Earth round."

Mama

Yo mama so fat.

In Super Mario Galaxy, she was a fucking planet!