Plane

Plane jokes

Helicopter

What is the difference between a plane and a helicopter?

A plane hits a building, but a helicopter hits the floor.

Tower

Someone who was working in the tower must've put their phone on plane mode.

Captain

You: "Captain, where is this plane going?"

Captain: "New York, 175 Greenwich Street."

Attack

What did one twin tower say to the other? "Be back, I gotta catch a plane."

Atomic Bomb

Why did the Japanese NOT shoot down the American plane that was dropping atomic bombs?

From what their eyes saw, it was a piece of rice.

Passenger

There was an air crash of a Boeing 737-800 which can carry around 300 passengers.

It crashed in a cemetery.

They recovered 500 bodies.

Plane Crash

There was a plane crash. The pilot's names were Captain Sum Ting Wong, Wi Tu Lo, Ho Lee Fuk, and Bang Ding Ow.

Hair

What did Trump rename the Presidential plane?

Answer: Hair Force One!

Door

People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.

9/11

I hate jokes about 9/11... every joke has the tendency to crash and burn.

"I didn't get the joke at first, but then it hit me like a plane," the joke was so dark a cop almost shot it.

9/11

Guys, we should not make fun of 9/11. Like, that stuff is just plain out crazy. Like, you all should not let that fly.

Pilot

So, I was getting on a plane, and the pilot does his usual speech talking about altitude and what not with the microphone, and he forgets to turn it off, so after the speech I heard him and the co-pilot talking about what they were doing after work, and whatnot.

Then the pilot said he was dying for a blowjob and a coffee, so a stewardess ran to the pilots cabin, and then left about 15 minutes later, and the pilot shouted "Next time don't forget the coffee!"