Plane jokes
"I like planes."
- Plane Guy
What did the people in 9/11 say when they got the wrong pizza? Man, they got it wrong, I wanted this shitty plane!
There were 500 bricks on a plane. One fell off.
Little Sally was crossing a river full of crocodiles. How did she survive the river? She had a gun. When she got out of the river, she died. Why? Because a brick fell on her head.
I took my friend skydiving once, and he jumped out of the plane without a parachute. Then I remembered he was emo.
Me dozing off while driving.
Everyone else on the passenger plane: September 11, 2001.
What is Osama bin Laden and his al-Qaeda organization's favorite song?
It's raining planes! Hallelujah!
When does a Pentagon have 4 sides? When it's intercepted by a plane.
A guy jumped out of the Twin Towers, saying, "I ordered pepperoni pizza, not a plane!"
The sexy towers are just like my sexy toes because when I crashed a plane into the tower, it burned and bled.
If 9/11 happened again, I want to share a selfie of me flying that plane.
What do you call an Indian plane that comes back?
A Boomerang.
That forehead is so tall it can eat a plane! Open wide!
Why did the planes crash into the Twin Towers?
Because the cleaner left the landing lights on!
What is the similarity between math and buildings?
Two parallel lines can be intersected by a plane.
Did you know that in 2001 there was an Among Us game, except that it was on a plane and had two imposters.
I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."
And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"
A teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories. There were all the regular type of stuff.
But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. "Janie, do you have a story to share?" "Yes madam... My daddy told me a story about my Mom." "OK, let’s hear,” said the teacher.
“My Mom was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife. She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.” “She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.”
Pin drop silence in the class!
"Good Heavens," said the horrified teacher, "What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?"
“Stay away from Mummy when she’s drunk...!!!”
Dear Victims... äh Passengers, we are flying now from Ryadh to New York. Amazing Building... äh Amazing City. There's online, but 2000 there were two Towers... äh Restaurants. We hijack the plane... äh Hi Jack. Jack is my co-pilot, and I said hello. Don‘t scream... History Repea... äh... History never comes back, we are now flying back to the Airport. 💀
(The plane) we can’t go over it, we can’t go under it. Oh no, we have to go through it.
I met a kid at the park. He was holding a picture of his parents in his hands. They had died on 9/11.
So, I went to comfort him. I said, "Hey, I lost my grandpa on 9/11. He was great. At flying a plane."