Physiology Jokes

Shit

How do you help a constipated person?

You scare the shit out of them!

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  • Difference

    What’s the difference between a bird and a human?

    “We don’t eat with our peckers.”

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  • Enzyme

    What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?

    You can't hear an enzyme.

    Human

    Technically, a human is hollow. We have an empty tube through us from the mouth and nose to the asshole and dick or pussy. We are basically tubes.

    Life

    Why am I still alive?

    Pills give me stomachaches, blood makes me faint, height frightens me...

    Heart

    Why does the heart listen to music a lot?

    Because it loves feeling the beat.

    Enzyme

    What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?

    You can't hear an enzyme, but you can hear a hormone.

    Sex

    They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?

    Shit

    What comes in and comes out, but you should never miss it?

    Any ideas?

    SHIT!!!!

    Woman

    I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.

    Coffee

    People say your body is 75% water, while mine [is] 100% full of coffee.