How does a blind person know when a skydive has finished.
The dog lead went slack
I was reading a book about an immortal dog yesterday...
It was impossible to put down
I named my horse Mayo.
Mayo neighs.
billie: hi
me: you wanna hear a story?
billie: yes sure
me: once upon a time, i ran over your dog last night.
what do you call a dog with no legs? It dosent matter what you call him,he isnt coming.
What's the best part of working at an abortion clinic?
Free dog food.
Q: How are Asians like a box of chocolates?
A: Either way they'll kill your dog
Dad: Hey son wanna here a joke?
Son: Sure thing, dad!
Dad: Your mother and I are getting a divorce. She found out that I was sleeping with the neighbors dog!
Son: I don't get the joke, dad.
Dad: It's my life son! My life is the joke.
whats the diffrence between a dog and a dad ? The dog comes back
I went to the zoo the other day. The only animal there was a dog. It was a Shih-tzu (shit zoo).
When I was teaching my dog tricks, a Chinese man came to me and asked why was I playing with my food.
Like if your bestfriend has a dog
Old mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to get her poor dog a bone.
But when she bent over, Rover took over, and gave her a bone of his own
Why did the dog 🐕 join the marching band?
Because he had his trum-bone.
how does the bunny keep his fur neat
with a hare brush
So a blind guy is sitting on a park bench his seeing eye dog right beside him. Suddenly his seeing eye dog cocks his leg and pisses all over the blind guys leg. So the blind guy gives the dog a treat. A man taking a walk saw the entire thing and said to the blind man. That is the most charitable thing I’ve ever seen, your dog deliberately pissed on you and here you are giving him a dog biscuit. The blind man says Oh it’s not what you think I’m just trying to find his head so I can kick him in the Ass.
What is the one thing wrong with Asian pet stores... There is always a kitchen in the back
What do you call a house with dog hair? A shed
How do u turn a baby into a dog? Douse it in gasoline- light a match-*WOOF*
what do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter whutcha call him he ain't comin'
