Pet jokes
My dog went through my bathroom garbage, and for some reason, my sister put a bunch of ketchup packets in there...
Where did my rabbit go?
*crunch*
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he's not coming.
What do you call a dog that is part pug, part poodle, and part cup? A muggle! 🤠🤠🤠🤠🥴
Are you my fish? Because you're supposed to be dead.
I was taking my dog on a long walk when I heard a loud scream. I ran towards the sound. There I found Penaldo sinking in a pit of mud. I was trying to help him out when my dog said, "Leave him, he's been in the mud for years." I walked away shocked but not surprised.
I have some black friends who hate it when I say the N-word around them, so I got a pet monkey.
I went to the zoo but all I saw was a dog.
Yeah, it was a shih tzu.
I walk in on my mum and she's in the middle of pulling off my dad's boxers. I said, "Mum, you really spoil those dogs!"
Why don’t you have a pet cheetah?
There cheetah you.
One day my pet barked at me and so I got scared and was my dad actually. It was weird, you should’ve saw him and so the day goes on because he likes to run around the house that he likes to do it out 😂😂😂😂😱
Dog.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter; it ain’t coming to you.
I had sex with my dog once, and my cat hissed at me for not doing her.
Fun fact! If you steal your sister's cat, she will be mad.
What do you call a dog that tells the time?
A watchdog.
What do you call a girl furry?
A pussy cat.
READ THIS OUT LOUD:
This is this cat.
This is cat.
This is how cat.
This is to cat.
This is keep cat.
This is an cat.
This is idiot cat.
This is a busy cat.
This is for cat.
This is forty cat.
this is seconds cat.
NOW- go back and read the third word from each line from the start.
So you know there's like dog mixes, right? Like a Snoodle and that stuff, right? So why can't a bulldog and a shih tzu be mixed? 'Cause if they did, it would be called bullshit.
What did the hungry Dalmation say when he had some kibble? That hit the spot!