Person jokes
What do you say to a person who got his whole left side cut off? "Are you all right?!"
Person: You're so ugly.
Me: You ugly.
Person: I'm not a mirror.
Me: And I'm not your reflection.
A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.
What do you call a short person that goes to school?
A Sammie.
What do you call a person with no nose and no body?
Nobody knows.
What do you call someone who wants to jump off a building?
Cause they want to become Super Man.
They say there's a person capable of murder in every friend group.
I suspected that it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.
What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.
When you're at a funeral and you laugh at the body... everyone stares, and one person said, "Isn't that your mom...?"
What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?
One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.
Why was the short person a coward? They didn't stand up to challenges.
What did Scorpion say to the ugly person?
"STAY OVER THERE!"
A person in NYC is shot every 5 minutes. Poor guy!
Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.
Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.
Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?
Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!
A person laughs every day.
"Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!"
Me: Knock knock.
Person: Who's there?
Me: No-one.
Person: No-one who?
Me:...........
I went to the bank to apply for a Personal Loan.
Then they found out I wanted to be a rapper, so they didn't want to Post M"loan."
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.
I am really gay. I just needed to confess this.
Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”
Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”