Person jokes

Relationship

Liberal

The media's relationship with Hillary is just like Bill's relationship with Hillary. The relationship is unwanted and forced, and they'll move on to the next person any chance they get.

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  • Memory

    It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.

    You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?

    When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...

    ...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)

    Light Bulb

    So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...

    How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.

    There’s also one about a bowling ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though. I'll research that.

    Health

    "Don't forget you are what you eat," said one person. "Then I should eat a skinny person!" said the other.

    Memes

    Idk

    Dumb person: Wat idk mean?

    Person 1: I don’t know.

    Dumb one: Oh u don’t know okie I ask Googol.

    Person 1: Wait idk means--

    Dumb one (to Googol): WAT DOS IDK MANNN?

    Googol: I don’t know.

    Dumb one: OH ME GOOOD EVEN GOGLO DOESYN KNOWWW

    Refrigerator

    What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...

    It don't moan when u put milk inside.

    Man

    How can you tell if a man is straight? You don't have to, he will tell you.

    Murder

    They say there's a person capable of murder in every friend group.

    I suspected that it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.

    Super man

    What do you call someone who wants to jump off a building?

    Cause they want to become Super Man.

    Eye

    What do you call a person with 2 black eyes?

    Nothing, you told them twice.

    Side

    What do you say to a person who got his whole left side cut off? "Are you all right?!"

    Roast

    Person: You're so ugly.

    Me: You ugly.

    Person: I'm not a mirror.

    Me: And I'm not your reflection.

    Loser

    What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.

    Funeral

    When you're at a funeral and you laugh at the body... everyone stares, and one person said, "Isn't that your mom...?"

    Coward

    Why was the short person a coward? They didn't stand up to challenges.