Person jokes
Knock, knock. Who's there? An armless person. Why? They got stumped on why they contacted you.
What is the chair's favorite person?
A sit-izen.
Lewis Clow
You should never leave a man hanging.
Unless they are still alive.
A lumberjack goes to a person's house.
Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.
If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."
What do you call someone with no arms and no legs?
A nugget.
It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.
You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?
When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...
...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)
So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.
There’s also one about a bowling ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though. I'll research that.
"Don't forget you are what you eat," said one person. "Then I should eat a skinny person!" said the other.
What do you call a person with no nose and no body?
Nobody knows.
What does a person eat before a race?
Answer: They fast.
When you're at a funeral and you laugh at the body... everyone stares, and one person said, "Isn't that your mom...?"
Person 1: How many people has Michael Jackson fingered?
Person 2: Dunno, what’s the minor population?
How can you tell if a man is straight? You don't have to, he will tell you.
What do you say to a person who got his whole left side cut off? "Are you all right?!"
Person: You're so ugly.
Me: You ugly.
Person: I'm not a mirror.
Me: And I'm not your reflection.
What do you call a person with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told them twice.
They say there's a person capable of murder in every friend group.
I suspected that it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.
What do you call someone who wants to jump off a building?
Cause they want to become Super Man.