Parent jokes
What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?
"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."
I was going to make a depressing joke, but my parents already did.
New teacher: "I was an orphan when I was young."
Student: "But!"
Teacher: "Is something missing?"
Student: "Your parents!"
You are so intelligent that parents come running to beg you to be their child!
I told my mom I'm happy and she said: "I didn't know you were gay."
Memes
Kid #1: You're adopted.
Kid #2: At least they wanted me.
Kid #1: Did your real parents want you?
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and orphans?
At least the Twin Towers saw the parents they crashed on.
A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. They’re appalled by his haircut, his tattoos, his piercings.
Later, the girl’s mom says, “Dear, he doesn’t seem to be a very nice boy.”
“Oh, please, Mom!” says the daughter. “If he wasn’t nice, would he be doing 500 hours of community service?”
If you're ever bored, just rape an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents!
Hahaha come on people, they don't have parents, we can do what we like with them...
Rape...hurt...and sell them!
"Roses are red. Violets are red. My parents' bed is red. Oh shit, I set the house on fire!"
A kid went to visit his bully, and he says, "How's your face?" The kid says, "How's your parents?" and proceeds to walk out of the orphanage.
Q: What can't teachers say to orphans?
A: "I'm calling your parents!"
Why did your emo mom get you?
To have someone to hang out with.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent!
Me at an orphanage: I need to talk.
Orphan: My parents!
Me: You know that word?
When someone said to an orphan, "My boyfriend ghosted me," the orphan says back, "Don't worry, my parents ghosted me!" 🤣
The parentless child stood as her orphanage was blown up by a kamikaze I had rented.
A kid goes into a restaurant without parents, and a waitress came up and said, "You have to leave; this is a family restaurant."
Me: Shut up! If you don't shut up, I'm gonna tell your parents!
You: Why? I don't have any.
What is a cannibal's favorite place to go? An orphanage. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?