Parent jokes
Joker: Knock knock...
Batman: Who's there?
Joker: Not your parents!
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and orphans?
At least the Twin Towers saw the parents they crashed on.
In 2001, my parents took me to 9/11. I was soaring towards it with excitement!
I gave an orphan 5 dollars and I said, "Spend it on a candy bar." I came back 5 minutes later and he didn't have a candy bar. So I look over and I see that he has a piggy bank that has 40 dollars and I said, "Where did you get that?" He said, "For being homeless," and I said, "What are you going to spend it on?" He looked at me and said, "I'm going to pay money for a mother."
Why are orphans bad at hide and seek?
Because they can’t find their parents.
It’s like I always tell my kids:
"Two in the pink, one in the stink."
My mom: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?
Me: No.
Attack on Titan music starts playing in my head.
My parents came back from their vacation in Florida, and all I got is this lousy nursemaid from Miami named mammie.
Today was no fun. A rhino escaped from the zoo and ate two parents, and I lost my job as zookeeper.
Why can orphans stay out until whatever time?
Because their parents won't tell them when to come home.
I'm serious, what's a "dad?"
A game that all orphans hate,
"Who's your Daddy?"
If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.
Why is it okay to make fun of orphans?
Because they can't tell their parents.
Orphans are the best people to bully. They have no parents.
My parents told me that I should go hang with my friends and get out of the house.
So I called some of my friends and told them to meet me in the school yard. One said, "What tree?"
I replied, "You’ll know when you get here!"
My parents never said how they wanted us to hangout.
What can Miles Morales do that Spiderman can't?
Hug his parents.
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
Dad jokes.
What's the difference between a cheater and your mom?
They both cheated!
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.