Parent jokes
Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.
My mum found a chest that was wet, and it had a child in it. She asked me what it was for. I said I put kids in it and chuck it in a river until they are dead.
Don't listen to people when they say you have a dad bod. You don't.
You have a father figure.
My parents came back from their vacation in Florida, and all I got is this lousy nursemaid from Miami named mammie.
When you met her first before your parents met each other. (In the case of your mom dating her dad).
My ex was an orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?
How do Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They tell her to sit in the corner in a circular room.
Why are orphans always sad?
Because their parents aren't there to cheer them up.
*P.O.V orphan wanting to go on school trip/camp*
Teacher: “Can I have your parent's signature? It isn’t filled out.”
Orphan: “Um yeah.... That’s gonna be hard....”
Teacher: “Why?”
Orphan: “I just have to find them first....”
Friend: Wanna hear a joke?
Orphan Friend: Sure.
Friend: Parents.
Other: I don't get it.
Friend: And you never will.
Q: What type of mother gives their daughter sperm? A: A furry mother.
The top worst thing for an orphan, and probably the most awkward one, is when they're having sex and the other person is calling them "mommy" or "daddy."
Toast is like parents.
If they are both black, you have nothing to eat.
Why can orphans stay out until whatever time?
Because their parents won't tell them when to come home.
Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.
If you're mad, hire an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents? 🤣🤣
Well, a boy and a girl are in a bathtub together.
The little boy says, “Hey, you see that? I’m gonna go ask Daddy what it is.” When the little boy asks his dad, he says, “Well, son, that’s your car. You try to park it in a girl’s parking spot.”
As the boy runs back, he see’s the little girl is missing. It had turned out that the little girl was asking her mama what her spot was and she said, “Well, that’s your parking spot. Never ever let a boy put it in.” When she got back, the little boy tried to put the car in, well he did and she ended up breaking his car that day.
I saw a little kid crying today. I asked where his parents were, and he started to cry more. I left the orphanage to get some milk after that.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and your parents?
Nothing. They are both just memories.
I wrote a few jokes:
What does a 15-year-old boy do without two hands when his parents are not at home? Well, obviously do not jerk off.
Yesterday a girl from my job invited me to her home and there I had crazy sex. I could not think that her mother is so hot.
What will happen the morning after the destruction of humanity? Duncan MacLeod makes himself breakfast.