You don’t usually see strap-hangers carrying newspapers these days. But one guy with the New York Times is seen getting on a crowded F Train. He notices a single seat not taken. Suspicious, he gets closer and sniffs it out. The seat is discolored but dry. Throwing caution to the winds, he removes a section from the paper and sets it down to buffer the spot from his behind. He sits down, stretches his feet and yells out: “Try sitting on your smartphones, suckers!”

why did England beat Germany in world war two scissors beats paper

“Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road”? “Cause there was a crack”

we hired this boy to pick up dog poop we just remembered that we don’t have a dog

Why did the chicken cross to the U.S. from Mexico? To get to the U.S. but he had to show his papers first.

Friend 1: I HATE YOU! Friend 2: cries b-but i-i didnt say t-that!! Friend 3: writes on paper with pencil cuz is so bored Me: points at pencil lead NOW NOW NOW THIS HAS LEAD TO SOME SERIOUS FRIENDSHIP LOSS! plz shut up. All my friends: groan at horrible pun

So, I got a paper towel roll, ripped it, but started to fart when I ripped it off, and stopped farting when I got it off the rool, and then I said; “I guess that’s why it’s called ripping one!”

Toilet paper cried across the road

How come the toilet paper could not make it across the road?

Because of the Corona Virus

Do you want to hear a joke about Paper? Never mind its Tear-able

“Paper is 2D!” said Pen. “No, it’s 3D!” said Pencil. After Pencil proved it to Pen, Pen said; “Oh, I suppose you’re write.”

Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack…

Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the street?

Because it got stuck in a crack :)

Anyone know how to get an A on the “An Inspector Calls” section of the GCSE paper?

Maishah The poo comes from an old bathroom in a country starting with b

The toilet having an argument with the toilet paper, the owner of the house had a diarrhea, who’s day was more shittier!?🤷‍♂️💩

Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end the faster it goes and every one is trying to shit on ya.

Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?

It didn’t want to get stuck in any more CRACKS

Whats so funny about toilet paper? The toilet aspect!