how do you make a orphan cry? ask to go over to his house if his parents are OK with it
Terorist: we can go over it, we can’t go under it, let’s go through it.
I troll under different usernames, I'm abit all over the place mentally.
My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden. He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, " You have to dig a little."
Bill? Bill?" bill hears faintly in the distance. Bill Nye snapped back into reality only to find he had peed all over the set.
so i was asleep and woke up and went to work my wife left already to her job i was driving my car and ran over someone i woke up in my bed realized it was all a dream 20 minutes later i got a phone call the my wife got hit bye a car
Everyone always has a special person in there life someday, but I think yours got ran over by a bus
New skin unlocked: Blood splatter! (Obtained by running over 69 children)
My girlfriend got ran over by a bus I lost my job as a bus driver.
My Dad was mowing the grass today, I looked out the window and saw him slumped over the lawnmower. Apparently, he was just going through a rough patch.
What time is it when you get a chance to take a car 🚗 and drive all over? Time to get in trouble
My favorite sex possition is the “JFK”, i splatter all over her as she screams to get out of the car 😂
Did you hear about Alicia's car accident? She was really drunk and all over the road Until she was all over the road.
i was in the bank one day and this old lady asked me to check her balance. So i pushed her over
I was watching my boyfriends dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with the him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When i looked down, he appeared to be dead. My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do ,so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waiting for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said ,”you know , your dogs been a little depressed lately...”
A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!
A woman marries a man and has 7 children. The husband dies, and she marries another man. She has another 7 children, and later the husband dies. A year later she gets married again, and has another 7 children. She dies after a few months. At the funeral, a man see the priest looking at the heavens. He walks over and hears the man say, "They're finally together again." The man look at the priest and says, "With her husband?" The priest looks at the man and says, "No, her legs."
A german soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her." (say the joke aloud and it will make more sense)
A guy walks into a bar and sees a 1 foot piano player over by the door. He goes over to the bartender, orders a beer, and says “man, how’d you get such a short piano player.” The bartender says in response” there’s a genie in the back of the bar.” The man finishes his beer and runs to the back, looking for the genie. He finds it and says “I wish for a million bucks.” Suddenly, a million ducks fly out of the bar. The customer looks confused and goes back to the bartender and says “what just happened” the bartender replies “the genie is half deaf, do you really think I’d ask for a 12 inch pianist?”
