So, a retarded kid's mom drops her kid off at school and says, "You better stop the bus today, because I’m not picking you up." So he agrees, and he arrives at the bus stop and says, "Stop!" (in a retarded voice). The bus goes straight past him. The next day, the mom says the same thing, and the kid goes to the bus stop and says, "Stop!" (in a retarded voice). The bus goes straight past him. The third day, his mom says, "I don’t care if I have to jump out in the middle of the road, you better stop that bus!" So the kid goes to the bus stop and jumps out in the middle of the road and says, "Stop!" The bus driver runs over him. A nearby lady stops the bus and says, "Why’d you run that poor kid over?" and he responds, "'Cause he was making fun of me" (in a retarded voice).
Overeating Jokes
What's black, gold, and red all over?
Tupac in Vegas.
Why are there no good Indian actors? Because all the good ones are trying to get your bank details over the phone.
When a person asked to see her balance at a bank, they pushed him over.
What is the difference between Dray Dray and an overrated footballer called Pogba?
How many gay guys can you fit on a bar stool? Four, just flip it over.
What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.
A kid milks a cow and goes to school and tells his friends, "I milked a cow, and it took awhile for it to warm up." His brother came over and said, "We don't have cows, we have bulls."
The teacher asked her class to use "definitely" in a sentence. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. "The sky is definitely blue." "Very good Kevin, but the sky can also be blue or black," the teacher replied.
Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him and picked Annie from the back of the room. "The grass is definitely green." "Very good Annie, but it can also be brown." Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Finally, she called on him. "Mine's more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?" "Why no, Johnny, why would you ask such a question?" She questioned. "Well, if they don't have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself."
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Heaven.
Heaven who?
Heaven fun over there?
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was emotionally distressed after a break up and wanted to find some help at his friend's pen. In the end, he was run over by a car, marking a sad end to what might have been a good chicken's life.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
Yo mama so far that when she walks outside at 8 a.m., it becomes midnight all over again.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar. The man orders a beer, one for him and one for the giraffe.
After they finish their drinks, the giraffe falls over, and the man gets his stuff and heads for the door.
The bartender says, "Stop! You can't leave that thing lying on the floor!"
The man says, "Mate, that's not a lion, it's a giraffe."
So, you wanna hear a joke about the wall?
... Actually, nah, you won't get over it.
I wank over Rose Watson.
The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters, ...
so Trump can't tweet it.
What did the Tin Man say when he got run over by a steamroller? -- "Curses! Foil again!"
How do Mexicans feel about Trump's wall? -- They'll get over it.
