Orphanage jokes
What is an orphan's least favorite show?
"Full House."
I saw a little girl crying, and I said, "Where are your parents?" That day, I got fired from the orphanage. 🤪
Being an orphan isn’t all bad.
On the bright side, all your snacks are family sized.
Why do orphans hate Fridays?
Family movie night.
Why does an orphan hate the internet?
Because he's always on the homepage.
Why do orphans hate playing sports in school?
Because they never get picked.
Why do orphans not like July 24th??
Because it's Parents Day.
Why can't orphans eat Doritos? Because it's family size.
"Bill swift here, you make them, we take them!"
What's another place orphans can't work at besides SC Johnson?
The Home Depot.
Why can’t orphans work at SC Johnson?
Because it’s a family company.
Why doesn't the orphan date the girl?
Because she is a home-y.
Why does an orphan always try to escape the orphanage?
Because he wants to get money to buy a family since they won't buy him.
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?
Because it has no home button.
I was at work and then a little kid came up to me and she said, "What happened to all the parents?" She sounded so confused, so I told her, "It's only yours, kid, they left you on purpose." She cried. I felt bad for a second and thought, oh well, time to get back to my job at the orphanage.
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Kidnapper: Hey kid, your parents told me to pick you up.
Kid: Sir, this is an orphanage.
Kidnapper: ...
Who comes when an orphan gets married? They are allowed back in family restaurants, but when I go in alone, I'm not allowed. I have some parents, for God's sake!
Spend all night in a dark humor webpage.
Go to an orphanage today and read it to them.
And I'm sure if you go to a school for disabled children, they should understand it.
Next time you get a call from anybody, say, "Hi, welcome to Dave's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"
Or,
"Hi, welcome to Pizza and Abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce!"