Orphan jokes
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
They can never make it home.
Why can't orphans go on an away trip? Because they already are on one.
As siblings, we always joke about being adopted. It stops being funny when you're playing in your parents' room and find both of your adoption papers.
What's the difference between apples and orphans? Apples actually get picked.
I made a website for orphans, but sadly it didn't have a home page.
What's the difference between puppies and orphans?
The puppies actually get adopted.
What is an orphan's favorite beer?
"Fosters."
Why did the orphan commit mass murder?
To be on top of the wanted list.
April Fool's joke: Go to an orphanage and tell them, "Their parents came back."
What do you call an orphan's family tree? A stump.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They wanted someone to call "daddy."
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell him to clap until his parents come home.
What show does an orphan hate?
Family Guy.
What's an orphan's favorite movie?
"Home Alone."
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
Why did the orphan become a killer?
Because he knew they would not look for him.
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar? They don't have Father's or Mother's Day.
Why can't orphans learn about Ancient Egypt? Because they won't know what a mummy is.
Tell a dark joke to an orphan, then hit them. They'll get the punchline right away.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a watermelon? One of them is fun to hit with a sledge hammer and the other one is just a watermelon.
Girl: I've been an orphan since I was three.
Boy: Knock knock.
Girl: ...Who's there?
Boy: Not your parents!