OH Jokes

Roses are red, the sky is blue, what do you do? Oh, never mind, I'm not homo like you.

What did the pond brother say to his lake sister?

"Oasis!" (Oh, hey sis!)

Man: How tall is a penguin?

Bartender: About three foot, why?

Man: Oh shit, the Bible-bashing nuns! I fucking hit one!

Poor car.

OWWWWWWWWWWW I JUST GOT A CUT ON MY BUTT. Oh wait, that’s always been there.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your grandma died, your dad left you too, Now you're living with your old grandma coot. Oh, let's not forget your mom left you, too. You gon' live alone, die alone, with no roses on your casket, too.

A vintage comic book cover shows a car flying through the air with a woman driving. A man on the sidewalk exclaims: "Watch out, mister! It's a woman, and she's trying to parallel park!" A man on a bike says "Son of a..."

So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”

Did you hear about the unborn fetus? Oh wait, never mind, it must have been aborted from the sight.

It’s a bird.

It’s a plane.

Oh, shit it is a plane!

Why do people make orphan jokes... their parents will get mad... oh wait, never mind, please continue.

Store owner: You have to be 40 inches tall to go into the adult section.

Kid: Please.

Store owner: Oh okay, but get on your tippy toes.

Kid: Everybody is hugging.

What did the traffic light 🚦 say? Oh.

Roses are red, My c0ck is blue, Oh shit, what happened to you?

What do you say when the toilet is clogged?

Oh shit!

When Knife tells Annoying Orange, "I'm trying something new," Annoying Orange said, "Oh no, are you having a midknife crisis?" and then Annoying Orange laughs.