Ocean jokes
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED. Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don't be a BEACH.
My grandfather was there when the Titanic sank. He shouted 3 times that it was gonna sink until they finally kicked him out of the movie theater... haha
If you were on the Titanic and you didn't leave the ship, what would you do? Just let that sink in.
3.14% of sailors are...
π-rates.
Pennywise: "They all float down here!"
Titanic: *hold my beer*
What is the most popular fish in the ocean? "A starfish."
Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? -- Because the octopus was well armed.
Why did Sally get to go to Hawaii for free?
She washed up on the beach.
What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? About half way.
When I was a child, my parents told me my uncle was 'sleeping with the fishes.' At first, I thought he bought a water bed, but I then discovered he was killed and buried at sea.
How does a fish always know how much they weigh? -- Because they have their own scales.
What do you call a fish that smokes? "A puffer."
People in 1912: "Titanic is unstoppable, even God couldn't sink this ship."
God: "Bet, where are my icebergs?"
What is the Titanic's favorite mint?
Icebreakers.
What did the woman on the beach say to Michael Jackson? Hey, get out of my sun!
Three men are on a boat. They have four cigarettes, but nothing to light them with. So, they throw a cigarette overboard and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.
A wild Iceberg appears! Titanic uses ram! It is not very effective. (Titanic sinks.)
Why are dolphins so smart?
Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!
How do you cut the sea in half?
With a sea-saw.