Ocean jokes
What do you call James, James?
In 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He sat on a rock, tickled his cock, until it turned red, white, and blue!
"Jack Sparrow."
"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"
What did Columbus use to cross the ocean?
He used a bus.
I went to the aquarium this weekend, but I didn’t stay long. There’s something fishy about that place.
Why did the plane crash in the ocean? Because the pilot saw steward Undercut!
What's a shark's favorite sandwich? Peanut butter and jellyfish!
How did the shark do on his math test?
Jawesome!
Ur mama so fat that when she went to the ocean, all the whales started singing, "We are family," even knowing your fatter than me.
What does the Titanic sell most?
Icebreakers.
Why did the rapper become a fisherman?
Because they loved dropping BASS.
A baby penguin sat on an iceberg. The baby penguin watched the Titanic sink.
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
TITANic
What do you call the mushy stuff between sharks' teeth?
A slow swimmer...
What do you call male mermaids?
Mer-butlers!
A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.
Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."
Your mama so fat she sunk the HMS ship!
What comes up on small oceans? Microwaves.
What is big and stupid?
The Titanic.
I was at the beach today, and there was a big wave.
Somebody went, "Damn, that crashed harder than the Twin Towers." Jack may have survived the towers, but not the crash.