Number jokes
A kindergarten class is learning about the alphabet. The teacher asked, "What comes after M?"
Little Timmy reached into his backpack and yelled, "16!"
Q: Why was 10 afraid?
A: Because he was always between 9/11.
Why can't Asian people use a telephone?
Because they might wing the wrong number.
(6x9)+6+9=69
Why was 10 scared? Cause he saw 9 rape 11.
Memes
What kind of number hates nuts?
17.
Sex sex sex free sex tonight, I mean 666-3629.
Why is every number scared of 7?
Because 7 "ate" 9.
Why was 10 afraid? Because he was 'tween 9 and 11.
What’s the best thing about fucking twenty-eight year olds?
There’s twenty of them!
There was a person inside who needed help from the police, but the police changed their number, so he ordered a party with pizzas from 2 airplanes, but the pilots were stupid, so they put people instead of pizzas, and one landed on the 93rd floor and the 94th floor, literally.
I asked my class what comes before 47. Everyone said 46, except for the quiet kid who said, "AK."
789.
What comes after 69?
Mouthwash.
Why is six scared of seven? Because 7 8 9.
Then why was 10 scared? Because he was between 9/11.
How many orphans can you fit in a bag of chips?
One, if the bag is family size.
A blonde accidentally kills a cop and calls the police.
She exclaims, “Hello, is this 911?”
The other person, “Yes, what is your emergency?”
The blonde answered, “I called to inform you that you’re 910 now.”
Why was 10 scared?
Because it was in the middle of 9 and 11.
Two's company, cheese a crowd!
Why shouldn’t you call people in China?
Because there are so many Wings and Wongs you might "wing" the wrong number.