Nothing jokes
What does grass and Rachel Sutherland’s wrists have in common: nothing, they both get cut.
You know what pun is used for "waist?"
Nothing. You'll find nothing.
It's just a waste of time.
What did the orphan's mom say to him when he got into trouble?
Nothing, because he doesn't know his parents...
What does an orphan call home?
Nothing. 🤣
I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.
Did you?
Friend: If you could get rid of any one person in your life, who would it be?
Me: Me.
Friend: *does nothing*
(x_x)
I forgot that I don't have friends.
I used to know a guy from a nudist colony.
Man, I tell you, nothing looked good on him!
Wife: Hi babe. Husband: Hey. Wife: Do you wanna? Husband: YES! Wife: Ok, make sure you have a towel to go to the beach. Husband: WHAT? You mean go to the beach? Wife: Yes, what did you think I meant? Husband: Oh, nothing, bye. Wife: Bye, see you there.
What kind of people love donuts in the morning? Cops, because they don't have anything else to do.
What does a peeing pterodactyl sound like?
Nothing, the pee is silent.
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
What’s the difference between my lawn and my wrists?
Nothing, I cut both of them.
Person: Hey, do you know what's the best thing in life?
...
You do realize that I said nothing, right?
Me: Exactly :)
What was the score of the basketball game in Africa?
Eight-nothing.
What did Stevie Wonder see when he got murdered?
Nothing.
Bully: "You are so stupid!"
Classmate: does nothing.
Bully: "Oi, I'm talking to you!"
Classmate: "Oh, you're talking to me? I thought you were talking to yourself."
You can't be a loser if you have nothing to lose.
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
Adopted kid:
Hey, Alex, what are you doing?
Alex:
Nothing, just playing my game. Anyways, you know you can call me "dad."
Adopted kid:
OK, dad Alex.
Alex:
Oh, come on! My game! I’m winning. Let’s go!
Adopted kid:
I’m so glad I have a mom.