Not jokes
Why was the noble gas not emo?
Because they were thinking RIGHT.
Dark jokes are like gay people, Not everyone likes them.
What's blue and bad for your teeth?
A green brick that's painted blue after the original paint dries (it takes a little while to dry), but after it dries you can paint it and then it will be green. If the brick is green it is called a green brick as it is green (not blue anymore) and it hurts your teeth because brick is a hard material that can damage the bones in your mouth (also known as your teeth).
What do you call an African that is not hungry? Dead.
You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.
What do an orphan and an apple not have in common?
The apple actually gets picked.
What’s the best cure for not wanting to go to work?
Suicide.
Sorry to take your time today for a few minutes. We are cool, but not the best.
Dad: Here you go son, all your toys have gone to the orphanage.
Son: Why, Dad?
Dad: You would be bored there if there was not anything to do.
Why do orphans eat breakfast with water?
The dad did not come home with the milk.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
The picture gets hung with one nail, not two.
After standing in line staring at McDonald's menu for 17 minutes,
Me: "Okay, I'm ready. Can you help me not be sad all the time?"
I'm great!! I'm good. I'm doing good hahaha. I mean "well" haha! Haha I'm doing well, not good! Haha I'm not doing good! I'm not doing so good.
Therapist: And what is it about this generation that bothers you?
Satan: I give them the intro tour and they just say shit like "ooo spooky lol."
Therapist: That's not so bad.
Satan: When I showed one girl the pit of everlasting flame, she sighed and said "big mood."
They say the first time doesn't work, third time's the charm. Ha, not!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Me.
Me who?
Not me.
Why will the orphan never say, "Honey, I'm home?"
No one wants him, not even the bees.
One day my mom told me not to be an actor. I said, "But mommy, I will make a lot of money!"
Dear clothing websites, if it's out of stock, DO NOT ADVERTISE IT!
What goes down but not up?
An emo.