Not jokes
Ryan: Mother, if you had 10 cookies, and I took 4 away from you, how much do you have?
Mother: I will still have ten cookies, because I will not give any to you.
Ryan: What if I forcefully take 4 cookies away from you?
Mother: I will have 10 cookies and a dead body.
Ryan and his mother had cookies that day. Ryan took all 10 cookies. He was never seen again. R.I.P Ryan.
My childhood tormentor was at school. I walked through so I could get to class.
And then he said, "Hey, you donkey!"
I said, "Thank you, I'm so happy that I'm something, not nothing like you!" And I gave him a pink lollipop. He walked off. And I became popular. Or should I say, Lolli-Popular? Sorry.
Don't be sad, because that's das backwards and das not good.
What's the difference between a baby and a pizza?
One does not crow when you put it in an oven.
If you are a robot, you cannot talk.
I don't ever really bother women, but when I do, I usually just want to talk. I guess since I just so happened to be a straight male that's not a 10 or a 5, I get shutdown so fast. I put out lit candles...like damn, I thought I hid my ring.
Me: Imagine not having hair.
Kids: On chemo.
Bitch the fuck.
Why did the toilet paper not make it across the street?
'Cause it got stuck in a pothole!
Which restaurants can an orphan not go to?
A family restaurant.
Roses are not always red, Violets are violet, not blue. Irises are never red, Petunias can be kinda blue.
What does this tell us 'cept you can't trust a poet to tell the truth.
How come the toilet paper could not make it across the road?
Because of the Corona Virus.
Alicia was not a popular girl. None of the guys noticed her. Once she got a boyfriend, but then he cheated on her with Katy and said, "You're not sexy enough, Katy is much hotter."
So Alicia took a match, set herself on fire, and screamed, "THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE!"
And then she died.
A wild Iceberg appears! Titanic uses ram! It is not very effective. (Titanic sinks.)
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.
Why shouldn’t you pick on a midget with learning difficulties?
... Because it’s not big and it’s not clever.
I did not.
What is the difference between a human and a tree?
A tree cannot walk, and a human can walk.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they cannot find home.
Why did not the toilet paper make it across the road to escape the corono virise?
I ain't shaking anyone's hand, not because of the Coronavirus... I ain't shaking anyone's hand because y'all out of toilet paper!