No one jokes
No one:
Taeil: "Happy Christmas~"
Haechan: "It's Merry Christmas."
You're so fat, no one was laughing, but the floor was cracking!
Why does no one look up at Steven Hawking?
You have to look down to see him.
The other day my brother hit me. I yelled for mom. No one responded.
What's the difference between me and an old man? No one pulled my life support.
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
If I was a poo, I’d be the one that gets stuck to the bottom of the shitter when no one wants ya xox.
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call “daddy.”
Why is an orphan good at being naughty?
Because they don't have no one to tell them off.
Once a naked woman robs a bank, but sadly, no one can remember her face...
One night when I was six, I had this super annoying accent, and when I said the number "six," Oh no... One night my Catholic priest asked me how many cookies I needed for my family. I told him six, but thanks to my accent being mixed with many others including Scottish, French, and Russian, it sounded like I said "I need to have sex." He looked at me strange then pulled me into a closet, being a pedo.
When Momma asked me why I was missing for 6 hours, I told her, "I went to get the cookies like you told me to, and father raped the Christianity out of me." The angry look she gave my father was amazing. Then with my Papa, she beat the hell outta him.
Serves him right.
Me: Knock knock.
Person: Who's there?
Me: No-one.
Person: No-one who?
Me:...........
In India, 3 things are wide and far everywhere, but no one admits: racism, sexism, and Sunny's jism.
No one has my back like my dad.
Chinese Names - Annie Wan (Anyone)
Caller: "Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?"
Operator: "Yes, you can speak to me."
Caller: "No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!"
Operator: "You are talking to someone! Who is this?"
Caller: "I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent."
Operator: "I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?"
Caller: "Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one) was involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one) got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital."
Operator: "Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious, but I don't have time for this!"
Caller: "You are so rude! Who are you?"
Operator: "I'm Saw Lee (Sorry)."
Caller: "Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!"
What do you call a cow that no one likes? The mooser.
What is the smartest month?
April - No one can fool it.
What is the difference between a pornstar and a mosquito?
No one stops sucking.
Say yes if you wanna fuck.