Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the duck cross the road to get to his quack dealer?
One day my dog died because we couldn't find him. Then we got a cat on the same day. Then my cat went missing, and when I was crying, we heard our Asian neighbor was having a party. Then we went over and I saw my dog and cat on the grill, and they ate them in front of me, saying "yum yum doggy in my tummy and cat in my tummy as well."
Michael Jackson is pure cheese.
I mean, Jacko comes on a little cracker.
Yo mama is so ugly that her portraits hang themselves.
How did Helen Keller drive?
One hand on the wheel, one hand on the road.
"Come on now, gay jokes aren't funny."
Guys, am I funny?
If I flip off an Asian person, he can't see it.
What do you call a terrorist in a bathtub?
Bathbomb.
Why do orphans go to prison?
Because that's their only home.
What did the parents name their retarded baby? Dimitri
I woke up one day to find handcuffs on my bed. Turns out, the girl I drugged yesterday escaped.
When the person who killed JFK heard "headshot."
What's black and white and red all over?
A newspaper.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck?
If a woodchuck could chuck wood?
As much wood as a woodchuck could chuck,
If a woodchuck could chuck wood.
Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing!
I flew a paper airplane and I rate it 9/11.
Why do orphans only have 362 days in a year?
Because they don't have Mothers', Fathers', and Family Day!
Four big guys.
I was walking past an orphan and I said, "Just go home."