Worst Jokes Ever
What's red and bubbly and scratches at the microwave glass?
A baby in the microwave!
What's 72?
69 with 3 people watching.
What did Stephen Hawking say on the stairway to heaven?
Oh, fuck! I can’t get up them.
I heard Microsoft got charged, why?
They couldn’t reboot Stephen Hawking.
What do you call a gay scientist? Stephen Hawqueen.
What do you say when Trump is still president during 2020? Magic!
Why does Stephen Hawking have the voice of an angel?
Because no one has ever heard an angel talk.
Number 1 ventriloquist dies at age 76, will be mist.
Now that Stephen Hawking is dead, the jokes will start to roll in just like he used to.
Who did Stephen call when he crashed?... The geek squad.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite type of basketball?
Dribble.
What does Stephen King call his wife...
The black hole.
Am I in Florida, because I'm triggered?
In about ten days, Stephen Hawking's wheelchair is going to have its first and last service.
Stephen Hawking missed assembly this morning.
For one of the most highly regarded minds on the planet, it is a shame he could not create a longer-lasting battery.
He's not dead, his batteries have run out.
He's not really dead, his update failed.
Stephen Hawking isn't really dead, he's just rebooting.
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."