Worst Jokes Ever
I love going to Hooters and looking at the menu... If you know what I mean;)
Guys, go to https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/5b3937c1a328f6072c316bd6/hey-guys-who-wants-to-play-roblox-with-me-we-can-go-om-cool-maps-my-name-is-xx_robloxgamer420_xx-pleeease-lets-play-rol and read the whole thing because I need people to play with, and everyone is being retarded. Thanks guys, goodbye.
Why did Johnny not like the audiobook he got for his birthday?
Johnny was deaf.
My dad was a roof cleaner and I'm dedicating this to him, so dad, if you're up there!
I go in to get a prostate exam. I'm nervous, but the doctor says it's all natural and needs to be done.
So he pulls down my pants and sticks one finger up my ass. I feel it go deeper inside, feeling for abnormalities.
That's when I realize his hands are on my shoulders.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Duh!"
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he isn't coming to you.
What's the best thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's 20 of them.
What's the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Theodore.
Theodore who?
Theodore is locked, that is why I knocked.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Robin.
Robin who?
Robin you, that is who.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Apaches.
Apaches who?
Apaches on your eye.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Por que.
Por que who?
"That's all, folks," in the words of Por que Pig.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Esteban.
Esteban who?
If you do not open the door, Esteban you!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Abajo.
Abajo who?
I have abajo of water with me.
What does a cat say when it's angry?
- Stop stressing meowt!
What is similar about a dog and a woman? You can ask them to come.
OMG, I had a really good hand joke, but I just couldn't put my finger on it.
Two hunters were walking through the forest one day. All of the sudden, one of them passes out. The other hunter panics and dials 911. The emergency responder says, “911, what's your emergency?” The hunter replies, “My friend just passed out and I don’t know what to do! I think he might be dead!” The emergency responder replies, “Before you do anything, make sure he is dead.” The phone goes silent, and then the responder hears a gunshot. The hunter gets back on the phone and says, “Ok, now what?”
Why do Pirates say "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"?
First time out at sea, they prepare for battle and say to their commander:
"The canons be ready, Captain!"
"Are," says the Captain (correcting their grammar).
"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!" they all exclaimed!