Worst Jokes Ever
What knight is never wrong?
Sir Tain.
Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me.
It means a lot!
Why was the beach salty? Because the land didn't wave back. The ocean then called the land a beach.
I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday.
I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
Why did the M&M go to school?
It wanted to be a Smartie.
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
Because he lost his filling.
How do poets say hello?
Hey, haven’t we metaphor?
Did you hear about the two people who stole a calendar?
They each got six months.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.
She looked at me surprised.
(P.S. I am not at that age plus I am as straight as a helix ruler.)
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it.
What did the bald man exclaim when he received a comb for a present?
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the end of paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?
A receding hare-line!
Where are average things manufactured?
The satisfactory!
A woman in labor suddenly shouted, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Didn't! Can't!"
"Don't worry," said the doc. "Those are just contractions."
Did you hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
There's no menu. You get what you deserve!
Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar...
"GET OUT OF HERE!!!" The Bartender shouts, "We don't serve your type!"
Why do we tell actors to break a leg? Because every play has a cast!
I like pepper.
What is the thirstiest ocean in the world?
The Gulf of Mexico lol!