Worst Jokes Ever
Why are basements so scary? Cuz of the mail.
How do you circumcise a hillbilly? You kick his sister in the jaw.
A grasshopper walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says, "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper looks confused and says, "Oh really? You have a drink named 'Bob'??"
What's 12 inches long and begins with a p?
A shit.
What did the cow say to the other?
"Cheese!"
ble get get get gettttt pull the glock pew pew pew pew pew thats the silencer BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
What did Caesar call a person?
She-Caesar.
Balalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!
Don't trust an atom. They're stupid!
2+2=7
Why did half of the world not see Avengers: Endgame?
Because half of them were Thanos snapped in Avengers: Infinity War.
What is the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson?
The location of the Dirtbag.
How does a tree get online? They log in.
Do you think the ocean is salty because the beach never waves back?
Q: What's the hardest part about eating vegetables?
A: Putting them back in their wheelchair.
Three construction workers were sitting on the bridge that they were building, having their lunch break. The first guy says, "If I get a Vegemite sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The second guy says, "If I get a peanut butter sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The third guy says, "If I get another strawberry jam sandwich, then I am going to jump off this bridge." The next day, the first guy gets a Vegemite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich, and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All three guys jump off the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals, the first wife says, "If he just told me, I would have given him a different sandwich." The second guy's wife says, "It is all my fault. If only I knew." The third wife says, "I don't get it, he makes his own lunch."
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house!
Knock knock?
Who's there?
The chicken.
The chicken who?
The idiot chicken who just crossed the road!!!
What is the sun's favorite chocolate bar?
A Milky Way 😱
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Fourth of April.
Fourth of April who?
May the fourth be with you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Gun. Gun who?