Worst Jokes Ever
You watch 50 Shades of Grey, and you turn grey in bed.
Nolan is a mole, who lives in a hole, and then had intercourse with a troll.
I remember my mom's last words before her divorce, "Did you just load in me?"
My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers.
To be honest, I should have seen the signs.
What do James Doyle and Hannah Doyle have in common?
John fucked them both in the rear.
"Orla Doyle is fit."
What's the difference between a chocolate cake and a dead baby?
About 5000 calories.
Did you know pigeons die after sex?
At least when I fucked it.
What do bananas wear into battle?
Banana-rama!
What did the bottle of conditioner do on the toilet?
Shampoo.
What did the angler say to his students at the end of his fishing class?
Catch you later!
You should never date a prospector. They're all just gold diggers.
America once was known as an Obama nation. Now we're known as an abomination.
Water?
What is the best part about eating cake? Your mom.
Mom: Go water the plants.
Me: But it’s raining outside.
Mom: Go grab the umbrella.
Me: What???
Stephen's not dead; his WiFi is slow.
A man walks into his house, only to find out somebody stole all of his lamps. He was absolutely delighted.
On Xbox Live, an orphan can say "they f-ed your mom," so you can say, "at least mine didn't die from it."
Yesterday I made food using oil--olive oil.
(I love oil!)