Worst Jokes Ever
Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."
Gym Teacher: "That's alright."
Other Kid: "Hush!"
How to get your woman to come upstairs? Say you are naked.
What do you call an Islamic LGBT member? A Gaylism.
What is better than hitting a booty? Playing with the titties.
How do you clean the ocean?
With tide!
Teacher: Ok kids, time to go home.
The orphan: What is home?
Teacher: Here, I have somewhere for you.
*puts in trash can*
I know why Stephen Hawking loves Transformers so much now.
Autobots, "Roll Out!"
Me: *listening to music under a tree and smiling*
Random person who sees me: Awwww look at him, he looks so so happy ^w^
Me: *actually listening to depressing music that makes me wanna kill and end myself but just smiles to show that everything's gonna be fine even if it won't*
Friend: You ok, man?
Me: Yea... I'll just leave myself "hangin'" tonight...
Suicide is the way to get even with the bitch called probability.
Suicide: Turning one's biology into complex organic chemistry.
What hit the ground first, the feather or the depressed kid?
The feather, the rope was stopping the kid.
Patient to doctor: "Will I be ok, Doc?"
Doctor: "I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus now."
Patient: "I don't do that astrology stuff."
Doctor: "Nor me. My thermometer just broke."
You're so poor not even Dollar Tree has your prices.
Are you electricity? 'Cause I wanna get a bath with you ;)
9/11 and Jenga are the same.
It's a controlled demolition.
I used to be into necrophilia. Until that rotten cunt split on me...
Why was the short person a coward? They didn't stand up to challenges.
"Fish, why you no fly?"
"I don't like being caught naked."
Poop + mouth = yummy for dung Beatles and HEDGEHOGS!