Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

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My friend's dad went to jail. He's just surprised because he can finally find him!

I told my wife I needed a blood transfusion when I could not remember. She said, "Be positive too."

Bad, I am now a ghost writing this.

My mom asked, "Why are you so depressed? It could be worse. You could be Tracy Latimer."

I replied, "I wish I were Tracy Latimer because then someone would kill me."

A bus full of ugly people is driving down the street. The bus crashes and everyone goes to heaven. They see Saint Peter, and he feels bad for them and grants them one wish before they go into heaven. The first one says, "I wish to be attractive." The second one says the same.

Meanwhile, the 3rd person in line is giggling and snickering and laughing while Saint Peter is granting wishes. Curiously, he asks why he is laughing. He says, "I was going to wish that they turned ugly again."

What's the difference between a Nazi and an onion? If you cut a Nazi, nobody is crying.

A kid and an apple fall from a tree, who will reach the ground first?

The apple, because the kid is hanging on the tree with a rope.

Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.

Why do disabled people not like comedians?

Because they do stand up.

My dad told me "No electronics at the table," so I unplugged my grandma's life support.

Boys are like minis.

Girls are like big pots.

Minis always come first. Don't think about sex boys, be men.