Worst Jokes Ever

Attention, everyone: I will be leaving this website. Thank you everybody who has been nice to me. Maybe I’ll come back in the future, but for now: Goodbye.

What’s the difference between drugs and kids?

I don’t do drugs.

Midget

Your mother is so fast, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of crack.

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

What did one nut say to the other? Ignore the guy in the middle. He's a d!ck.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Malaysian Airlines Flight 303!

Little Johnny's dad was driving him to school when they came up on a couple in a convertible. It was apparent that they were arguing. You could then see the woman pull out a knife. Seconds later, his dad saw a penis land in the windshield. Worried little Johnny will see it, he quickly turned on the wipers and brushed it off.

"What was that, Dad?" asked lil Johnny. "Oh, just a bug," said his father. With a confused look on lil Johnny's face, he then says, "That bug sure had a big dick, didn't he?"

One day I was walking along the street and I found some caution tape... Just sitting there torn up... Beat up, and you could barely unravel it anymore because I would just burst into shreds... It kinda reminded me of what happened to my sister's killer... They still haven’t found him yet... I’m really good at hide and seek!

What do you get when you gobble down sweets?

Hi hi hi.

Why wasn’t the rabbit jumping?

Because he was dead.

You are adopted.

No cap. No one loves you.

Bye.

I just did a test to see who my soulmate is, and it said "best friend." So I guess I am gay. I think so, WTF.

I am a registered sex offender. I'm just playing, I'm not registered yet.

She (DYM 110)

Brother: I bought my brother a trampoline today, the ungrateful fuck just sat in his wheelchair and cried.

Is "butt check" one word, or do I have to spread it?

Dislike this.

If an orphan got hit, will they go tell their parents?