What’s something you can say in bed and in a Zoom meeting?
"Do you want the cameras on or off?"
Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?
They're calling it Finding Emo.
"What do you want to eat?"
"You choose."
"Children."
"What?"
*Picks up pot*
"You said anything!"
A guy told a beautiful girl, "Hey, I want to make love to you. If I throw $2000 when you go to pick it up, that's when I'll go. Is that okay?"
She called her husband, and he said, "Okay, but pick it up fast so he doesn't have time to pull his pants down."
Four hours later, she shows up to her house and tells her husband, "THAT FUCKER PAID IN COINS!"
Sorry to hear you feel like poo!
You like kissing boys, don't you?
"Babe, is it in?" "Yeah." "Does it hurt?" "Uh-huh." "Let me put it in slowly." "It still hurts." "Okay, let's try another shoe size."
What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You can't milk a cow for over 10 years.
Bill Clinton is no longer playing the saxophone.
He is now playing the whore-monica.
Why do women have two sets of lips?
I kiss both.
Why did the rapper become a beekeeper?
Because he wanted to make some HONEY FLOWS.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to fish?
MC Reel
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
In case of ill rhymes!
Why did the rapper bring a map to the studio?
To find his way through the BEATS.
How do rappers keep their breath fresh?
With some FRESH BEATS.
What do you call a rapper's favorite insect?
A flow bee.
Why did the rapper go to the bank? (Part 2)
To WITHDRAW some BEATS.
Why did the rapper go to the bank?
To make some DEPOSITS of RHYMES.
Why did the rapper wear sunglasses to the interview?
Because his FUTURE was too BRIGHT!
Why did the rapper bring a calculator to the concert?
To COUNT his BARS.
