Worst Jokes Ever

Me walking away after committing murder in a school with my trusty “friend”.

Why were the baker's hands brown?

Because he was kneading a poop.

Ahhhhh shit! IT’S HUNTING SEASON y’all!

Yo mama is so ugly, when I took a picture of her, my phone screen cracked.

Yo mama so fat, she took both sides of the family.

Yo mama so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.

Why are the people that get your order at restaurants called waiters? They don't wait for the food; we wait for the food. They should be called "note takers." They take notes for food.

Jump in the Cadillac. (Girl, let's put some miles on it.) Anything you want. (Just to put a smile on it.) You deserve it, baby, you deserve it all, And I'm gonna give it to you. Gold jewelry shining so bright, Strawberry champagne on ice, Lucky for you, that's what I like, that's what I like. Lucky for you, that's what I like, that's what I like.

-Tommyinnit

"Jump in the Cadillac, girl, let's put some miles on it."

Yo mama so [full of] kidney stones Thanos used them for his gauntlet.

What did the evil chicken lay?

Deviled egg.

When you ask your mom for candy but you grab from the wrong drawer...

Daughter: Mommy?

Mom: Hey.

Daughter: What kind of kids do they use to make Sour Patch Kids?

Mom: They don’t use kids to make Sour Patch Kids.

Daughter: Oh, that’s why the ones I made taste kind of funny...

"Dude come here and see a rabbit!"

"Ok!"

"Are you ok, man?"

"Yeah, I’m fine."

"Dude, pull your pants back up!"

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

Because they can’t find home base.

One day, a lady and her husband were talking and it was time for dinner. He got up and sat at the dining room table, and the lady brought the plate of food in and she sat it down in front of him. "What's this?" he said. The lady said, "A piece of shit...honey! Want some water to drink?"

What did the pirate say when he saw a ghost? He said, "Oh my God, it's me dead parrot!"

Did you hear the passengers on the Titanic invited Yo Momma and the Titanic crew said, "Man overboard!"

Clit

What's My Favorite Thing About My Grandpa?

His life insurance...