Some kid online: I f*cked your mom.
Me, an orphan: Jokes on you, I don’t have one!
Worst Jokes Ever
I’ve got a joke about Alzheimers.
Um.
Oh no. I can’t actually remember it.
A person could build a playground with your mood swings.
Why do orphans want a phone so bad?
Because it has a home button.
Anyone want a free pizza? Because you liking a pizza with toppings that not many people enjoy allows you to eat the entire guilt free pizza, that they said they didn't want and everyone already offered you a slice of.
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning, and his dad was making a lot of mistakes. Suddenly, his dad screams, "Bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant, and his dad replied, "Aunts and uncles." Oh.
Next thing he hears is, “Dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks, "What's that mean?" To which his dad replied, "Uh, coats and hats." Oh. Next thing he knows, he sees his dad jumping around the bathroom yelling, "Fucking, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" "What does that mean, Dad?" And his dad yells, "Cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh.
Next week is Thanksgiving, and the doorbell rings. Johnny answers it and says, "Hey, bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, Dad's in the kitchen fucking the turkey."
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple? Apples get picked.
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Orphan: My parents.
What do you call a blind photographer? A waste of money.
What's big, bounces, and makes little kids cry?
My donation to the orphanage :)
Amber Heard Daily Routine:
Get out of bed, drink coffee, take a shit on Johnny Depp's bed.
What grade is the worst, like if in elementary?
Snowmen and snowwomen take a stomach piece, making snowballs.
I have an announcement, Shadow the Hedgehog is a bitch ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife and he said he dick was this big and I said that's disgusting, so I'm making a callout post on my twitter dot com. Shadow, u got a small dick it looks like this walnut except way smaller.
What did Amtrak say at the Olympics?
I AM keeping Trak!
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
Orphans can be a robber if they want because their parents won't be disappointed.
Why do orphans like belts?
They remind them of their father.
What did the hot dog say to the condom? "Hot dog condom style."
One rainy day a NASCAR race was going on and they had no other choice but to use this bitch's forehead. https://sportsrecruits.com/athlete/morgan_tomporowski
