Worst Jokes Ever
POV: Wine Taster in hell.
I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"
The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.
"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."
"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."
Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."
What's the scariest thing about white people in prison?
How rare they are.
How do you get 1000 followers?
Walk into an African village with a water bottle.
I always wonder what girls are thinking about. Maybe balls.
What do you call a ruptured Chinese man?
One Hung Lo.
I SH so much, even when I die and become a ghost, you can see red stripes floating around the room.
I ran over an emo yesterday? I wanted to let him see pitch black.
I threw a lamp at an emo? I tried to lighten up his day.
Like if you know someone is emo and comment "emo🇷🇺."
Why do orphans like being criminals?
Because then someone actually wants them.
Why do orphans love tennis?
Because it is the only place they can get love.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tray? The apple tray gets picked.
Where do orphans go when sad?
Not their parents.
Why can’t Helen Keller drive?
It’s because she’s dead.
Who would win in a race, Stephen Hawking or a turtle?
The turtle, because it can walk.
I asked, "Mom, what's that in the sky?"
Mom replied with, "That's your father."
End everything and your life, Steven Roca!
Stephen Hawking's least favorite song is "I'm Still Standing."
Why don't orphan criminals go to jail?
Because they weren't even wanted.
I think Paul Walker and 9/11 jokes are great, but when I tell them to others, they tend to crash and burn.
Friend: You are joking.
Me: Joking on deez nuts.