Ur mom loves to eat logs, lmao.
9/10/01
Bush: “Ok, I got this. Just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan.”
The umpire and the catcher were having a conversation. The runner slid into home, “I slid into this conversation.”
Who knows? Maybe the end of the world will be made in China too.
When you know you have a gay friend, but you find out that they like you!
A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.
Did you know penguins can fly if you throw them hard enough? Just like children!
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa Claus?
They're the ones that make the toys.
Good that you got detention because you said that to me; you should've gone to jail.
Life's like a box of chocolates. Doesn't last long for fat people.
How do you blindfold an Asian?
You use dental floss.
what makes emos jump?
a. bridges
Imagine orphans watching Spiderman: No Way Home.
So, a mom and a dad are having sex. Their daughter comes down and says, "Mommy, Mommy, what are you doing?"
The mom goes, "Uh, we're making a cake. Let's go back to bed." So she tucks her daughter in and says, "We will go to the park tomorrow."
So the next day they go to the park, and two teens are going at it in some bushes, and the little girl goes, "Mommy, Mommy, what are they doing?" And the mom goes, "They're making a cake. Let's go back home."
So they go home, and the mom tucked her into bed and says, "Tomorrow we will go to the zoo." And so the next day they go to the zoo, and two monkeys are going at it, and the girl goes, "Mommy, what are they doing?" And the mom goes, "They're making a cake. Let's go back home."
And so they go home, and the girl goes, "Mommy, did you and Daddy make a cake last night?" And the mom nervously says, "N-no, why?" And the little girl goes, "Because I licked the icing off the couch."
Why can't orphans go on game shows?
You need a family member.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
Neither of 'em can see their parents.
I bully orphans. What are they gonna do? Cry to their parents?
What is cum's favorite hotel?
The Four Semens.
Your hairline is so far back, it left before your dad.
Why is Viagra just like Disneyland?
It's a 1 hour wait for a 5 minute ride.
