I called a suicidal hotline in Iraq and they asked me if I could drive a truck.
If your sister steps on your toe, what will you call it?
It's not rape if they can't say no. Duct tape.
What did the customer ask when he went to the cannibal restaurant?
"Who's the special today?"
What is the American virus? Diabetes.
Just buy emo grass, then you will never have to mow your lawn again.
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
What did the twin tower say to the other?
"I need to catch this plane."
Why are Santa's balls so big?
Because he comes once a year.
What if Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady, but he couldn’t stand up?
Hiiii!
Which one fell first, the Emo Kid or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the kid.
You know I would tell you a 9/11 joke, but it just doesn’t hit the spot.
Why are Americans bad at Clash Royale? Because they lost both towers.
What is a four-legged animal called that can fly?
A donkey flying in the sky running away from me.
Why do cats leave scratches on arms? They don't; I do it myself.
Why did the slave go to college?
To get his master's degree.
A man marries a blonde chick, lives a happy life together, and the man asks his wife if she wants kids. She says "yes".
So, a couple of years go by, and they have one boy and one girl. They go to school, go home with their report cards, and the dad asks what their grades were. The son says he's not doing well, same with the daughter. They ask why they're doing so bad in school, and the dad replies with "ask your mother that question!"
What do you call a gay kid on fire? LGBBQ.
Name a nut. You because are nuts.
