Why is the leaning tower of pizza leaning? 'Cuz it had better reflexes than the twin towers.
What do you call a graveyard full of disabled people?
A cabbage patch.
I can get my grandma 50% off from her groceries by just scanning my wrist.
Why did John rape his mother? Because he wanted a brother to play Mario Kart with.
What do you call Joey in a room? Transgender.
What do you call Josh in a room...
Gay.
That joke didn't land well, did it?
It isn't really rape if you speak different languages. I mean, how is the man supposed to know what she is saying? Those could be tears of joy and screams of pleasure.
An orphan tried to make an app about orphans, but there was no home page.
There was a kid being mean to another kid at an orphanage. The kid said, "Stop!" but the mean one said, "What are you going to do? Call your mommy?"
What language do Gays speak?
HOMOGRAPHY maybe...
Your hairline goes back to when Jeff Bezos had hair.
Orphans eat their cereal with water because their dad never came back with the milk.
My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?
Me: 'Cause life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.
Pro tip kids, you CAN hit an orphan because they can't cry to their parents!
Your forehead's so big that I was tryna figure out if that was you or the moon.
My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:
Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*
What do you call someone with no nose and no body?
Nobody knows.
So, my mom was talking to me and told me to go to the store. When I get there, there’s a sign, but then someone tells me that’s just someone with a ginormous forehead.
Why are history teachers always women? Because they like to bring up the past.
