Worst Jokes Ever
🎆 New Year's Eve
Lil Johnny👦: "Every year the same, people always have to start banging before midnight!"
Mom👱🏻♀️: "Johnny, would you please leave the bedroom now?"
Dad👨🏻🦰: "Son, if you don't leave, it'll bang on your head!"
In 2023, I hope we all get wiped out like the dinosaurs.
I wish we were all aborted. <3
How do you get black kids to stop jumping off the bed?
You put Velcro on the ceiling.
How do you get the black kids down?
You invite the Mexicans over.
Imagine going up to an emo and saying, "You're just like a spider, you're both good at hanging."
Does this sentence make any sense?
What do you call the middle of a penny?
A center (get it? Cent-er).
"Does this make any cents?" a man says.
"Oh, it does make cents," me. <-- thing: Lemin"aid" <-- another joke.
Who is always looking spot on?
The cheetahs.
A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”
Q: What do Moses and hookers have in common?
A: They've dealt with a burning bush.
Which book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible plot twist?
- The math book. Suddenly letters appear in the calculations...
What do you call a night person? A night owl 🦉 who is up all night, lol!
I put the Christmas balls in my sack.
I was sitting in class when my teacher said, "Have any questions?" the suspended Class clown said, "Who's Joe?" So the teacher said, "Joe who?" So the clown said, "Joe Mama!" So I said, "What in the BALLS?" So I ended up staying in detention with the clown, ah, so cozy!
Knock knock. Hus dare? Luke. Luke who? Luke through the window and you'll see.
Never give up, 'cause never gonna give you up.
Never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna desert you.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Little Boy Blue. Little Boy Blue who? Michael Jackson.
I thought it was polite to open the door for a lady, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.
I got detention one day. I don’t know why; I only slapped the emo kid on the wrist.