Music jokes

What's black and white, black and white, black and white?

Michael Jackson.

When there’s an earthquake, coffins become underground maracas.

Why does the heart listen to music a lot?

Because it loves feeling the beat.

Me: U know the show called Imagine Dragons?

Friends: No, what is it?

Me: Imagine dragon this nuts across yo mouth.

I bought a wooden whistle, but it wooden whistle.

So I bought a steel whistle, but it steel wooden whistle.

So THEN I bought a LED whistle but it steel wooden LED me whistle.

Why did the guitarist go to prison?

'Cause he fingered A minor.

It's been known that Michael Jackson decided to do a song for the soundtrack for Free Willy, because he thought that he would get free willy in exchange for composing a song.

Why do girls wear classic rock T-shirts? Because they are stupid little bitches who need to grow some fashion sense because wearing old shit doesn't make you unique.

What's green and sings?

Elvis Parsley!

Why did the grandmother put wheels on her rocking chair?

... she likes to rock and roll lol.

Have you heard of Imagine Dragons (the band)? Imagine dragging these nuts across your face.

I got 99 problems but a chin ain't one.

God, I miss Stephen Hawking.

He was brainier than Kurt Cobain's ceiling.

What's the last thing that went through Curt Cobain's mind?

His teeth.

Do you like CDs?

There's this really cool one called "C Deez Nuts."

Why did the alarm go off when the emo and his friends left the store when they checked everything out?

The emo forgot to roll his sleeves up.

TIL Ariana Grande is actually a pop singer.

I thought it was a fancy coffee for white supremacists.

What is Michael Jackson's favorite candy bar?

Milk-hee-hee Way.

What is love? Baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more!

What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? A small skin flute.