Music jokes

Me: U know the show called Imagine Dragons?

Friends: No, what is it?

Me: Imagine dragon this nuts across yo mouth.

What's black and white, black and white, black and white?

Michael Jackson.

Why does the heart listen to music a lot?

Because it loves feeling the beat.

When there’s an earthquake, coffins become underground maracas.

I bought a wooden whistle, but it wooden whistle.

So I bought a steel whistle, but it steel wooden whistle.

So THEN I bought a LED whistle but it steel wooden LED me whistle.

Why did Michael Jackson decide to sell the ranch?

Because it was over 10 years old.

Why did the guitarist go to prison?

'Cause he fingered A minor.

Have you heard of Imagine Dragons (the band)? Imagine dragging these nuts across your face.

Why do girls wear classic rock T-shirts? Because they are stupid little bitches who need to grow some fashion sense because wearing old shit doesn't make you unique.

I got 99 problems but a chin ain't one.

What's green and sings?

Elvis Parsley!

It's been known that Michael Jackson decided to do a song for the soundtrack for Free Willy, because he thought that he would get free willy in exchange for composing a song.

Why did the grandmother put wheels on her rocking chair?

... she likes to rock and roll lol.

God, I miss Stephen Hawking.

He was brainier than Kurt Cobain's ceiling.

What's the last thing that went through Curt Cobain's mind?

His teeth.

What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? A small skin flute.

How did Michael Jackson challenge the victim's parents? "Then why won't you slap my face, because I'm bad?"

What is love? Baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more!

Why did the alarm go off when the emo and his friends left the store when they checked everything out?

The emo forgot to roll his sleeves up.

The first thing the emo did at the party is to pin the gun to their head.