Music jokes
When is a right time to dance on a body? If it is under the floorboards.
Why are pedophiles good at playing guitar?
Because they are good at fingering A minor.
I always think that percussions are golden, but cheeks are brass.
When an emo asks you to hang out under a tree...
I was listening to some Drake in class.
My teacher shouted to turn it off. She then exclaimed that "Drake is mid and his music is very Pessi!" I didn’t understand the meaning until I checked the dictionary and realised it is a synonym for overrated.
What is an emo's favorite song?
"Suicidal."
What do you call a kid with 15 nukes and a shotgun?
The final countdown.
Let's rock and roll!
What is Michael Jackson's favorite game? Jacks.
Why? He loved to play with the little balls.
Someone fucked a member of BTS.
What is an orphan's favorite song?
"Alone" by Alan Walker.
Q. What is Terri Schiavo's favorite Eminem song?
A. "Till I Collapse."
What do you call a group of emos?
The Suasied Squid.
What's white and comes in little cans?
Michael Jackson.
I asked an American if their national anthem was "Pumped Up Kicks."
A woman comes from a restaurant and ate a lot of beans.
When she gets home, her husband puts a blindfold on her and says not to take it off. The lady hears her husband leave the room and starts farting really loudly. When the husband comes back and takes off the blindfold, the lady sees 12 people with pegs on their noses singing happy birthday!
Emo
What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”
What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”
What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”
One day, Little Johnny came home with his girlfriend and told his dad, "We're gonna go to my room and do some homework." His dad said okay. Five minutes later, Little Johnny's dad heard noises coming from his room, so he went to go see what it was, and all he heard was, "Baby, baby, oh, baby, baby, oh." Little Johnny's dad started banging on the door and said, "Little Johnny, what are you doing in there?" Then Little Johnny said, "Dad, we're just having sex." Then Little Johnny's dad said, "Oh, I thought you were listening to some Justin Bieber up in here."
What has teeth but doesn't use them to chew? The answer would be a comb or a piano, but technically, if you ripped someone's teeth out and hand them to them, they have teeth but can't chew with them.