Yo mama so fat that when she farted, Big Shaq took off his jacket.
What is an emo kid's favorite song?
"Chain Hang Low" because he hangs low off a chain tied to a tree.
What's worse than ants in your pants?
Michael Jackson.
Alvin and the Chipmunks commit war crimes.
Would you rather listen to Justin Bieber or die in the slowest and most painful way possible?
They're the same thing.
Hi, I am Michael Jackson, pronouns are HEE/HEE!
Why is Donald Trump under so much stress?
Because he signed up to be on an album where somebody says "no love for the rich" on it.
Why can't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he has "no body" to go with!
Have you heard of Imagine Dragons (the band)? Imagine dragging these nuts across your face.
What's an orphan's favorite song?
"Gimme Shelter."
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We Are Family.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
So, I met Michael Jackson before he died. He dragged me to his bed.
Why did LankyboxGamesJustin go to the aquarium?
Because he's gonna dance with aquayyyyrium!
What do emo kids like to do in their spare time?
Hanging out.
Q: What do Olympians make bad DJs?
A: They keep breaking records!
What's the artist imagine something?
Imagine Dragons!
Imagine draggin' these nuts across your face!
What do u call a group of Emos
Suicide squad
You know how sometimes you want to listen to music?
But everything you listen to is just supremely unsatisfying, even if it's songs you usually love; they are just so unappealing, and you have no idea what you actually want to listen to.
What do you call being run over by Michael Jackson?
Being hit by... Being struck by... A smooth criminal.
What do you call an emo strip club?
Suicidal Thots.
