Mores jokes

Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:

Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.

What's more stupid than rapper and booty jokes?

NOTHING!

What do Call of Duty and Al-Qaeda goals have in common?

You’ve got to get more than one down.

I’m not a weatherman, but I’m expecting a few more inches tonight.

We see the movie Aladdin, and Abu steals more than Aladdin. I’m surprised that Abu hasn’t gotten killed yet.

1, 2 buckle my shoe.

3, 4 buckle some more.

5, 6 Nike kicks.

1, 2 buckle my shoe.

3, 4 open the door.

5, 6 Nike kicks.

I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.

I asked my mum to be in the Paralympics, and she said I had to eat more vegetables.

I went home one day and see a few married guys in line in my sister's room. I ask what's going on, my sister is running a contest. The contest is the married guys lick her pussy and guess what she had for breakfast. The winner gets a free blowjob. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder that she thought that she made up that contest.

What’s the difference between Geico and a wife?

Geico saves you more.

Yes, I have gained weight. I have also gained more brains. Do you want some? You talk like you definitely need some more.

Two flies were playing football in a saucer. One tells the other, “You’ll need more practice if you want to play in the cup!”

Bf: Hey, what ya doing?

Gf: Just lying in bed.

Bf: Just lying in bed?

Gf: And eating cereal.

Bf: Ha, nice, what would you do if I was in bed next to you...?

Gf: Eat my cereal.

Bf: I mean if the cereal wasn't there.

Gf: I'd get out of bed and get more cereal.

You’re a grey sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake.

You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.

America saying they are more stupid. Russia saying they are more stupid = the stupidest war.

I get more care packages than Africa.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 37 children and 41 adults during the ages of 31-35 years old.

She was then sentenced to a 35 year sentence (Colombian stuff) and came out 70 years old. She then continued to go on a spree and murder 41 more people, in 2 months. 3 years later, 6 stabbed 7 as they were friends. 6 was not sentenced, but deemed a hero. He never forgets that moment. Her soul not floating above, but screaming from the torture it's receiving.

Why couldn't the skeleton go to the prom? Because he had no BODY to go with...

I could have said a skeleTON more jokes, but I think that might break your funny bone.

Why do more men than women support abortion? So they can keep raping women and the victims will just abort their kids to not have to relive the experience!

What does a girl want more than anything in the world?

Nothing. She's fine.